After a long winter break, the Tooting Bec Bs were back on Saturday looking to return to winning ways against Wanderers Reserves. With this being the last game before the gaffer leaves the country in pursuit of Brazilian chicas and high quality (coffee) powder, the boys were up for it from the warm up.

We were back into the swing of things in no time, as some strong possession lead to a few early shots on goal. And the deadlock was broken after some nice build up play, with the ball making its way to Luke who stuck it away in the bottom corner (obviously he had been out in the garden practising shooting over Christmas). 1-0. In spite of his well taken opener, there is no doubt that LJ should be locked behind bars, as he went on to complete one of the biggest robberies ever seen in football. As per usual, Rennie got his meaty, baldy head on a back post delivery which was nestling in the corner, only for Luke to float in Nani-style and get a whisper of hair on the ball to steal the goal. Top shithousery. Within 5 mins our oppo had completely capitulated. Intense pressure from Scriv and Ro lead to us winning the ball high up the pitch and passing it on to Carlo who lashed the ball in the top left. To add icing on the cake, Carlo did his customary celebration in the faces of the oppo defence telling them that “you are shit, you’re bottom of the league”. Note to self… never call Carlo a pirate! HT - 3-0.

The second half started at a slower tempo than the first, with some passes going astray. But the goals kept flowing. Rudy had provided Rennie with a late Christmas present at half time by putting him up top, with it immediately paying dividends. For his overdue first goal, Rennie powered in another bullet header to make it 4. Quickly following that, a lovely move down the right hand side led to Rennie receiving the ball just outside the box and curling it into the top bin. Bosh. Being 5-0 up, the intensity had slightly dropped, however a rapid counter attack followed with Luke keeping his cool to slot the ball in the bottom corner for his hatty.

Unfortunately, we couldn’t secure the clean sheet on this occasion. The ref decided to give a questionable penalty against the Bec, as Mark did his best Zlatan Ibrahimovic / Jackie Chan impression with a high foot in the box. 6-1. The Bec kept threatening for more goals, with the last ten minutes seeing a sight more rare than seeing Tani at the rose and crown… Cam Maskell having not only one, but two chances to score! Unfortunately, the lad can’t shoot so the score remained 6-1. However, seeing the poor oppo nearly concede a goal to South London’s least prolific footballer, Petch decided to stop defending and let them score once more. FT 6-2.

A strong win to start 2023 with a win and set us in good stead for our next fixtures against Old Ruts. UTB